Speaking Up in Lab and Life

These everyday moments are opportunities to practice Assertiveness - the act of expressing your thoughts, feelings, needs, and goals clearly while respecting others.

For scientific trainees, assertiveness, otherwise known as self-advocacy, can help make expectations explicit and priorities clear.

At NIH, we believe you deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. You have a say. You can ask questions or ask for help, express your perspective, and communicate frustration or disappointment respectfully. You do not need to know every answer, or reach a certain stage of training, before your perspective matters.

As such, you also have a choice about when and how to speak up. In other words, you may be assertive. Being assertive can looking asking for clarification, requesting a private conversation, or asking for time to prepare a thoughtful response. You can be thoughtful and direct without being confrontational.

In a research environments, differences in authority and a dependency on mentors for career advancement can make voicing our concerns especially difficult. Understand that difficulty speaking up is not simply a lack of confidence.

Concerns about disappointing others, appearing unprepared, or damaging an important relationship are valid. You may also still be figuring out what you need or how to express it. Family expectations, cultural norms, and previous experiences can also shape how comfortable we feel questioning authority or setting limits.

When you are feeling unsure of whether to speak up, consider the context, the relationship, and what support may help you say what you need to say.

Before an important conversation, ask yourself: What is about happen? What do I need? And, what specific changes or next steps would be helpful to me?

A useful starting point is to identify the situation, explain its effect, and make a concrete request to the other person. Focus on what you have observed rather than assumptions about the other person’s intentions.

In practice, here are some examples of this might sound like:

1. “I’m not sure which experimental control you are recommending. Could we walk through the rationale before I start the experiment?”
2. “I’m working toward Friday’s deadline for the analysis. If I take on this experiment, I’ll need to adjust that timeline. Which should I prioritize?"
3. “I’d like to attend an OITE career exploration workshop next month. Could we discuss how to schedule it around my experiments?"
4. “I have a different interpretation of these results. Could I walk through the data that led me to this conclusion?”

Clear Asks give the other person something specific to respond to and a place to start. Always be sure to listen, ask follow-up questions as needed, and be open to discussing alternatives.

It is also important to distinguish your underlying needs from your preferred resolutions. You may need more feedback, for example, while being flexible about whether it comes through a weekly meeting by way of written comments.

Not every situation is life or death. Practice being assertive in everyday, low-stakes conversations to get more comfortable asking for what you need before the big conversations arise.

Choose an everyday situation where you feel relatively comfortable, such as asking a colleague to clarify a request, or sharing an idea in a small meeting, to practice being assertive. Write down your main point and practice saying it aloud.

Afterward, reflect on what you communicated clearly and what you might adjust. Progress can be as simple as asking a question you would previously have kept to yourself.

For the more difficult conversations, a trusted colleague, mentor, or OITE staff member can help you rehearse beforehand.

Remember, you can also be assertive by asking to give yourself more time if you need. This may look like:

“I’d like to check my current commitments before I answer. Can I get back to you tomorrow?”

Communicating assertively does not guarantee an agreement or a particular outcome. If your request is declined, ask what is possible, clarify the reasons, and consider whether another approach could meet your need. When useful, follow up in writing to confirm agreed priorities and next steps.

If a situation feels unhealthy or you are concerned about repercussions, seek support before deciding what to do. You do not have to address every difficult situation directly or handle it alone. A trusted training director, a mentor outside your lab, or an OITE staff member can help you think through your options.

This week, identify one question, need, or goal you would like to communicate to someone. Practice deciding who you want to speak with, what you want to say, and what preparation would help.

Self-advocacy is a skill you develop one conversation at a time.

OITE Career Counseling — Support for career planning and exploration.

OITE Well Being Resources — Individualized support, groups, and programs.

OITE Self Advocacy Workshop — Build your self-advocacy skills.

NIH Employee Assistance Program

NIH Ombuds Office — Confidential, informal support for workplace conflicts, including scientific disputes.